Still Here…

They tell me it’s 2012 now. That’s so strange to type, 2012. I was just getting used to writing 2011 and they switch it on me. It’s January, and the snow is finally falling, falling as fast as the new year’s resolutions. I don’t make new  year’s resolutions. I think it’s kind of like fasting because it’s lent instead of because your heart desperately needs to be fed: pointless. It’s like Benjamin Franklin’s a virtue a week phase; it isn’t ever going to work on your own power. The world didn’t end, I didn’t expect it to: If nobody knows the day or hour then I highly doubt that God is gonna let them think more of themselves by coming back on a date predicted. The world didn’t end so my life purpose is still the same: trying to be like Jesus, to glorify His name, and be a part of his kingdom coming on the earth. That’s not a very easy task, and just as with Franklin I can’t do it alone, ever, no matter how hard I try.  People can theorize, and sermonize, and try to explain why the new creation keeps digging it’s old self up again relentlessly, but I like the blunt way Rich Mullins put it:  “It’s hard to be like Jesus.” It is you know, we just like to leave that truth under dust and not talk about it in layman’s terms. It’s easier on the ears when it’s dressed up in big words and Christian code. “The old is gone, the new has come.” We like to ignore the part about a dog returning to its own vomit; that only fools do that.

Still here in this weary world fighting myself with Him. ” What I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” The struggle hasn’t changed much since Paul’s time, maybe not at all. So I cling to my Savior while the world flings doubts at me from every side; He helps me bury what is behind and look forward to what is ahead-even though I don’t know what that is quite yet. I’m walking into a new year, I have no clue what will happen before the end of it, but I’m not walking alone. The One that has overcome the world, the One who was perfect, the One who does know is walking with me. That fact makes everything ok, it makes me want to live for Him and die to sin as He has. Being holy as He is holy is a tall order, walking on water and turning the other cheek aren’t second nature to me, but I want to do it for Him. I want to dance into this new year following in His footsteps and radiating His holiness. I’ve been put on the impossible mission, yet nothing is impossible with God. As I watch the snow fall out my window I am reminded that He will rescue me when I fall, as with Peter. I know that I will not fall if I keep my eyes on Him and don’t turn to look at the old self. I know I’ll end up back there again someday; I know that He will forgive me and we will move forward again together. Without Him I am nothing, and with Him anything is possible. It’s hard but I know it’s worth it.

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Categories: Ponderings | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

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