And I don’t know what to write about this week. Should I write about the people, and how much I love them…how I am not treasuring this time enough as it is running short? Should I write about forgiveness and things coming out of the blue? Should I write about how, so often we don’t really know the people we’ve been with all along. Or maybe I should talk about how I don’t know if I have the ‘gift of teaching or not’, but I’m passionate about all the ones who could and should be taught better. Teachers have power, you know.
This week has given me nothing and so many things to write about at once. What shall I say? This blog is supposed to be a record of my journey with Christ, but if I’m honest I don’t really understand where I am right now. I don’t want to write any more words about waiting, and I’m not sure that’s what I’m doing anyhow. Words can’t contain everything. Maybe I’m not trying hard enough, but God is speaking. He’s speaking in subtler ways, and ways that are new to me. But still, He deserves so much more from me.
Time keeps moving; things and people keep growing. We are all moving on, but we can’t move on forever. We’re slowly dying. Those without the Savior have no hope. And what have I done to give them hope this school year? Has it all been for nothing? The relationships I’ve formed are too odd, circumstantial, and complex for me to describe. Have they seen Jesus in me? Have they seen His love, His passion, and His hope? The time is running short; all is drawing to a close. What awaits at the new beginning?