It’s October already. Where did the time go? I have so little time. This is passing far too quickly. Every day I am in contact with souls. It’s October already, and it doesn’t feel like I’m making a difference. Every day I’m rubbing shoulders with people in small town America, who –though they may not go down in history, though they may be insignificant in the grand scheme of things– matter immensely to God. I spend hours with people who grieve the heart of the King of the world, and so often I am numb, so often I just blend in. Do they see His life in me? Do they see His servanthood? Do I put them first?
Jesus said “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must put aside your selfish ambition, shoulder your cross daily , and follow me.If you try to keep your life for yourself , you will lose it. But if you give up your life for me you will find true life” That’s a high calling. I can’t do that. Only He can do that in me. Am I spending enough time with Him despite the stress of life? The answer to too many of these questions is no. I don’t want to regress again. There is a price to my decisions. My time with God doesn’t only affect me. I love the people too much to let them down. Do they see that love?
Priorities are everything. It’s easy to put objectives at the top: school, work, events. It’s harder to keep up with relationships. I miss the hours of prayer. My relationship with God will look different through the seasons of my life, and I acknowledge that, but it always needs to be the first priority. Nothing else should ever take that place.
And second, for me, should always be the people. The overused acronym “Jesus, others, you spells joy” is true. True life comes from picking up my cross daily, and losing myself in Him and for Him; true joy will never happen otherwise. I want my life to be pleasing to Him. I want to totally surrender my best and to give my all to Him as Mary did. Losing is finding. Giving away everything and gaining contentment– it’s a revolutionary concept. Jesus is worth my everything, and bringing others to Jesus is worth everything to me.
So here I am, the sinner preaching to the saints, but mostly to myself. This is my last chance. I need to get things in order now and not waste time. This phase of the journey is passing quickly, and too many days are already in the rear-view mirror. Nothing else matters this much because nothing else lasts for eternity. For “…how do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose or forfeit your own soul in the process?” I need to surrender the wheel of my life to Jesus daily, and then sit back and hang on for the ride.